The Take Off

I was never more aware of my heart than that moment on that day.

As the plane taxied away from the gate, I looked our through the rain streaked window. The last few days had been filled with goodbyes that made my heart ache from the weight of each one.

Just thirty minutes prior to this one, my hands had been held my my parents as daddy prayed a farewell blessing over me.

He's always done that, you know. The family would load the luggage and after each one had their turn of forgetting something and running into the house at the last minute, before daddy would put the van in reverse, or at the end of the driveway, he would call us to prayer. When the family stopped traveling all together, daddy would still pray over us. Especially as Sara and I started traveling on our own. He would get up early with us, carrying our suitcases down the stairs, say goodbye, and pray.

This time though at the airport, with my hand in his, tears escaped down my cheeks and dripped off my chin.

I have always loved the feel of my dad's rough, calloused hands. I used to judge other men by their hands because I though only good men had hands like my dad and grandpas. Now I know better and don't judge according to that now, but there are times when I still think of it. Calloused hands will always remind my of daddy.

My left hand was held in my mother's soft hand. I've always wished my small, pudgy hands were more like her slender ones. When I was younger, I would watch her hands in wonder. Her nails were always clean even though they were not afraid of dirt and in fact loved loved it. Her nails were always always nicely trimmed. I would try to trim mine just like hers so maybe they'd look more alike, but I could never find a resemblance. Except in our thumbs. I inherited that part of my mother's hands, and I think of her every time some one exclaims over them.

I turned my face away from the window and the rain. The take off set me back in my seat and adrenaline from the moment and the adventure ahead coursed through my blood.

I smiled and talked my heart into a regular pulse again at the same time choking back the tears again.

I knew tears might flow some time again, but for now, I let the window weep.